The tradition of tossing the bouquet originates from around the 14th century where guests of a wedding would commonly rip a brides garments apart to take home keepsakes, which were considered to bring them good luck. They were considered lucky as getting married was the destiny of most women and considered as one of their most important goals to achieve in life, second only to producing heirs. The guests would have no qualms about the safety of the bride and openly attack her in order to get a precious memento. As no bride would appreciate having their dress torn to shreds or risk being attacked, brides began tossing other personal possessions such as their garter, stockings and bouquet in lieu of having their dress ripped apart.
Today there is a growing trend for brides to eschew the tradition of the bouquet toss but I think that the toss is a great wedding activity that provides entertainment for guests and works well as a finishing touch to a wedding reception just before the bride and groom depart, along with the garter toss. It can especially be entertaining watching your guests pretending not to care about the toss but then turn into maniacs in their attempts to be the lucky girl to catch the bouquet!
Considering the nature of the bouquet toss is all about single women and marriage, bouquet tossing songs should be upbeat, empowering and all about women. It should be about strong women but also involves femininity. It can also be about finding love or about men. Upbeat songs will help to motivate the guests at a wedding to get up for the toss. The more women who get up the better as there are some women who find the toss a little embarrassing as the guest is openly declaring their relationship status. There are a lot of great songs choices out there to get all the women on the dance floor and to create great memories for wedding videos.
When deciding on a song thing of songs that you would love to dance or sing with your girlfriends to. It should be a song that women can relate to and that has to do with women getting what they want.
Tongue in Cheek
As the bouquet toss is all about finding out who will be the next girl to get married you could consider tongue in cheek songs such as Independent Women by Destiny’s Child as a mockery of what the toss signifies. This will be funny and entertaining for your guests. Other tongue in cheek songs that can be considered are Diamonds are a Girls Best Friend by Marilyn Munroe, to make a joke about the fact that all women want from marriage is a diamond or something along similar lines such as Material Girl by Madonna. You could also consider the Rocky Theme to poke fun at the fact that the women are going to be fighting for the bouquet.
Songs about getting married
A modern song that works great with the bouquet toss is Beyonce’s Single Ladies (Put a Ring on It). From calling “All the single ladies” to the dance floor and having the toss set against the lyrics of “If you like it then you should have put a ring on it, don’t be made cause you see that he want it” helps to create the perfect mood for the tradition of finding out who is going to get married next!
Another great idea for a modern wedding bouquet toss is the Sex and the City Theme, especially the movie version of the theme, as this sounds more big band. This theme works so well as Sex and the City is all about the single girl trying to find love which epitomises what the bouquet toss is all about. Other great songs about getting married or rather getting a guy to marry a girl is Wishin and Hopin by Ani DiFranco from the My Best Friends Wedding movie soundtrack which works wonderfully with the lyrics “So if you’re thinking how great true love is.All you gotta do is hold him, and kiss him, and squeeze him, and love him.Yeah, just do it!And after you do, you will be his”.
Other songs that work well are Chapel of Love by the Dixie Cups and Today I Met the Boy I am Going to Marry I by Darelene Love which works perfectly considering that tradition goes that the person who catches the garter is the person the bouquet catcher is supposed to marry.
Songs about women
Upbeat female empowering songs will work wonderfully with a bouquet toss. Think along the lines of Man I Feel Like a Womanby Shania Twain or one of the most popular choices Girls Just Wanna Have Funby Cyndi Lauper
The lyrics to this song work really well with the bouquet toss and should be considered by a bride if she is having a modern wedding.
Also consider songs about what the girls will be doing i.e Jump Around by House of Pain. This will surely motivate the girls to reach high for the bouquet.
Really out there
The song “A Woman’s Touch” by Doris Day which features in the film Calamity Jane is a very unique idea. The song describes how a woman can improve things. This song is very retro and if you are a feminist you should definitely not consider this song by it will definitely be remembered by guests and can be quite entertaining.
For a full list of Bouquet Toss Songs see below:
All That She Wants Ace of Base
Another One Bites the Dust Queen
At Last Ella Fitzgerald
A Woman’s Touch Doris Day (Calamity Jane)
Baby Got Back Sir Mix a Lot
Barbie Girl Aqua
Beautiful Girls Sean Kingston
Big SpenderShirley Bassey
Bootylicious Destiny’s Child
Can’t Hold us DownChristina Aguilera
Candy ManChristin Aguilera
Chapel of Love Dixie Cups
Diamond’s are a Girl’s Best Friend Marilyn Munroe
Don’t Cha Pussycat Dolls
Eye of the Tiger Survivor
FeverMadonna/ Michael Buble
Girl Fight Brook Valentine
Girls Girls Girls Motley Crue
Girls Just Wanna Have Fun Cyndi Lauper
Hit Me with Your Best ShotPat Benatar
Hot Sutff Donna Summer
I Feel Pretty Julie Andrews
I’m So Excited Pointer Sisters
Its Getting Hot in Here Nelly
Its Raining Men Weather Girls
I Will Survive Gloria Gaynor
I’m Every Woman Whitney Houston
I’m Too Sexy Right Said Fred
Jump Around House of Pain
Jumpin Jumpin Destiny’s child
Just a Girl No Doubt
Ladies Night Kool and the Gang
Lady Marmalade Moulin Rouge Soundtrack
Lets Get Loud Jennifer Lopez
Like A Virgin Madonna
Love is a Battlefield Pat Benetar
Love is in the Air John Paul Young
Man I Feel Like a Woman Shania Twain
Material Girl Madonna
Miss Independent Kelly Clarkson
Mission Impossible Theme
Most Girls Pink
My Girl The Temptations
One Way or Another Blondie
Pretty Woman Roy Orbison
Pretty Young Thing Michael Jackson
Respect Aretha Franklin
Rocky Theme Rocky Soundtrack
Sex and the City Theme Sex and the City Soundtrack
She’s A Lady Tom Jones
Shoop Shoop Song Cher
Sisters Are Doing It Eurythmics
Single White Female Chely Wright
SuperFreak Rick James
Someday my Prince Will Come Miles Davis/ Disney
These Boots are Made for Walking Nancy Sinatra
Today I met the Boy I am Going to Marry Darlene Love
This One is for the Girls Martina McBride
Uptown GirlBilly Joel/ Westlife
Wannabe Spice Girls
What A Girl WantsChristina Aguilera
Where My Girls At 702
White Wedding Billy Idol
Who Let the Dogs Out Baha Men
Wild Women Do Natalie Cole
Wishin’ and Hopin Dusty Springfield
You Cant Hurry Love Supremes
Brides Tips:
- Make a smaller Toss Bouquet – Brides, get your florist to make a smaller version of your bouquet for the tossing ceremony, that way you do not have to give away your bouquet to a guest.
- Don’t single out the “Single ladies” - Invite all women (even the married ones) at your wedding to participate in the toss to save the embarrassment of your single guests who might be uncomfortable
- Join the Garter Throwing and Bouquet ceremonies together by having the man that caught the garter place it on the woman who caught the bouquet
- Give the bouquet as a gift – Instead of tossing the bouquet consider giving it as a gift to the couple at your wedding who has been married for the longest time.
source of pic: valentinedesigns.com
The Arm Bouquet, also known as the side bouquet, presentation bouquet or pageant bouquet is a modern alternative to the traditional posy bouquet. This style rose in popularity a few years ago but recently there has been a decrease in the amount of weddings with this style of bouquet. The style first emerged in the 1930’s but is generally considered to be a more modern bouquet.
The reason for the decline is that the arm bouquet is very hard to get right and also hard to incorporate into your photos. This is due to the nature of the bouquet and the manner in which it needs to be held. I am not suggesting that brides should not consider this style of bouquet but brides need to consider the pittfalls in choosing this style. If done correctly, it can look extremely chic and stylish.
Walking down the aisle
As the name suggests the Arm Bouquet is held across your arm. Holding the bouquet extended on one arm and having the other arm extended to hold the person walking you down the aisle in some cases might be awkward for brides, especially if you have a small aisle. Having spoken to a bride who had this style it also feels quite uncomfortable having both arms bent as you totter towards your future husband. Consider the width of your aisle and who is walking you down the aisle when deciding on this style.
During the ceremony
Throughout the ceremony the maid of honour holds the bridal bouquet for the bride. You will need to consider what style of bouquet your maid of honor will have as she will be holding two bouquets through the ceremony and the ease at which she does this depends on the style of bouquets. If your maid of honour has an arm bouquet also she can possibly place your arm bouquet on top of hers, although she must remember to not squash the bouquet underneath. Alternatively if your maid of honour has a traditional posy or hand held bouquet it might be very difficult for her to hold the arm bouquet which will require the use of her arm as well as having her hand being occupied with her own bouquet. Apart from the comfort factor is the consideration that the maid of honour needs to undertake dress fixing duties throughout the ceremony, as well as periodically handing back your bouquet and will need a hand free to do this. Perhaps you could arrange for an alternate bridesmaid to handle your bouquet or place it in an easily accessible area to you during the ceremony.
Photos
As beautiful as this style can be, in photos, if not held correctly, the bride and bridal party can look a little awkward. If you and your bridal party all have arm bouquets you will need to consider that all arms will be bent in the photo as opposed to being held low and in front of the dresses. In some weddings I have seen bridesmaids who do not know how to hold the bouquet correctly end up affecting the symmetry of the wedding photos. A good idea would be to practice holding arm bouquets at your ceremony rehearsal with your bridesmaids by grabbing a bunch of long stemmed flowers to distribute and be held during the rehearsal.
Does the bouquet match your dress?
The arm bouquet is very modern and works best if your wedding style is modern. Brides especially need to consider the modernity of their dress when considering this type of bouquet. Traditional dresses are most suited to posy’s, tear drop and and cascading bouquets as opposed to the arm bouquet. Having an arm bouquet with a traditional lace princess style dress will be conflicting.
If you dress has very heavy detailing on the front which would normally be covered by a traditional bouquet you could consider an arm bouquet to ensure the detail on your dress is not hidden. Also consider an arm bouquet where your dress is slinky and in modern a-line styles.
Flowers
Certain flowers work best with arm bouquets and you should discuss this with your florist for the best options. Long stemmed flowers work best. For example you could consider tulips, delphiniums, long stemmed roses, gladiolus or calla lilies. If you like flowers which are not long stemmed you could arrange them on a bed of foliage to give the length required for the look.
(source:weddepot.com)
Consistency
Aesthetically speaking, symmetry and consistency works best with weddings. Although I have seen some beautiful weddings with conflicting styles of bouquets it is very hard to get this right. It is suggested that if you have an arm bouquet so should your bridesmaids and vice versa. The main reason for this is aesthetic. With different styles, in your photos, some arms will be extended whilst others are in front, and symmetrically speaking, it affects the continuity of your look. Having the whole bridal party with the same style will look more consistent and make your wedding look better coordinated.
How to do it right
Despite the above considerations there is a way that bride can do this style right.
- Have flowers that suit the arm bouquet
- Make sure the modern style of the bouquet matches your dress
- Consistency -If you decide on an arm bouquet, continue this style for your whole bridal party
(source: vintageglam.com)